i am doing this to hurt you

i am doing this to hurt you

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  • released: 1 march 2009
  • 1-4, 7-10 written by: david ding
  • 5 written by: david ding and sarah daly
  • 6 written by: david ding and colm bates
  • 11 written by: david ding and kara adams
  • with: kara adams [vocals on 11]; colm bates [vocals on 6]; sarah daly [vocals on 3 and 10]; jose r. duque [drums on 5 and 7]; lizzie moore [vocals on 10]; courtney pruette [guitar on 5]; colm prunty [guitar on 10]
  • artwork by andrew morris

civilian

you escaped
with your life
a little scarred
from the fight

in the street
in the light
i could see you waving
your flag of white

is it just a case of a misplaced step?
took a wrong turn looking for a lesser threat?
i place a hood on your head for surprise effect

seen it all
all before
had a plan
had it conferred
with advice
you could trust
seen it crumble
see you crushed

i couldn’t stand how you stood and let the boy stay lost
like his life wasn’t worth all the time it would cost
couldn’t crawl back along all the lines you crossed

i am doing this to confuse you
manipulate and abuse you
i am doing this to hurt you


fun fun fun

there’s a game
it’s called the innocent touch
spin a web
and watch the flies get stuck
i won’t play
but i can show you how
make them beg
before you turn them down

don’t you know i’ve got a whole lot of love to give
so much so, i’ve got to spread it

accommodate
my every need
you never bite
when it’s time to feed
i can’t recall
when i asked for more
meal for two?
i’ll set the table for four

don’t you know you’ve got to learn how to share your toys
you’re not special, you’re just like all the other boys
don’t you know i’ve got a whole lot of love to give
so much so, i’ve got to spread it out


the shape of things not to come

i heard the things you had to say
i’ve seen the thoughts etched across your face
why do you need to look away?
let’s take that chance – forget the reasons to stay

i never wanted to believe
that this could turn us into them
and now there’s no way to be free
from all things we never said


tried, tested

out of the clutch of your conviction i assess what i need
it’s funny just how much attention you require to breathe
it’s true i make mistakes, i stumble, trip, i fall and i bleed
but i’m not hesitant, just sensitive to certain degrees

i’m not upset when you’re repetitive – i get what you mean
i know it’s hard for you to change the things you can’t even see
i find my history has ceased to detail accurately
the many lacerations i’ve effected casually

it’s true i make mistakes i stumble, trip, i fall and i bleed
but i’m not hesitant, just sensitive to certain degrees
and should i make myself in short supply before you agree
or do i run the risk of finding out you’re just what i need


fuse

i’ve got the tools to make it work
i’ve got detachment, i’m alert
i’ve got to fix you, put you first
i’ve got a pill so it won’t hurt.
i’ve got a picture in my head
i’ve got you spread across my bed
i’ve got to kill what’s still not dead
i’ve got to keep this hunger fed

i’ve got to let you know
i’ve got to

i’ve got this dream i must pursue
i’ve got a thirst for something new
i’ve got to got to see this through
i’ve got the force to force you to
i’ve got to run you through my hair
i’ve got to make this circle square
i’ve got this dream i want to share
i’ve got to feel that you’re still there

i’ve got to let you know
i’ve got to got to go.
i’ve got to lose this itch
i’ve got a fuse, you tripped the switch


proximity bites

i’m not a sharing kind of person,
it always comes as shock when someone
wants to share with me.

she’s amazing.
talk to me.

i keep my distance.
she looks devastated. i’m enthralled.
i notice all her movements.
i never saw her until now.

she’s all alone. she calls.
tell me where you are.
i tell her. she can’t see me.
i’ll find you.
i’ll find you


all done

no smile when i watch her run
‘cross the bridge and back under the sun
i’m still her boy

finish line brings it back again
and with a twist it’s a signal when
she’s being not so coy
she’s not so coy

i still remember when we had a distant friend
to bring us two together through the night

a quick kiss walking out the door
pop back in for just a little more
she doesn’t mind

call ahead on my way back home
didn’t want to leave her all alone
all of the time
we’re intertwined

seems like so long ago, we didn’t really know
if we belonged together
but now we’re pretty sure that we can be mature
in dealing with whatever
we’re all done
we’re all done
we’re all done
we’re all done


minor injury

stall her while i slip out of the building
on my bike i’m racing through the city
check the time, i’ve planned it to the minute
execute with requisite precision

but can you really blame me?
i just get a little crazy.. don’t you?
and maybe one of them will save me
’cause every man needs a lady or two


gregory

took it up ’cause i wanted to
gave it back – was the thing to do
settle down with the only one
in the beginning has just begun

like to thank the man above
shook me up but He showed me love
got a job, got people to use
take it off i have nothing to prove

not one has all the luck
i’m not dumb i can read the book
truth hurts if you let it die
pack it up and wave it goodbye

go straight to my brother’s room
wake him up got things to do
lead us out on the beaten path
climb down all the trees we pass

sow a seed and protect the right
hold the fort till they see the light
take sides and put up a fight
best night of my whole damn life

the more we give
the more we try
the more we live
the more we


swords

[instrumental]


teardown

another picture off the wall
you’re killing time taking it all away from me
slowly shift without a sound
you’re setting up, i’m tearing down

i did it for you.


©2009 david ding